Reliving The Passion

... is really just going back to your first love.

Taking a moment of pause to relook, realign, rediscover.

[Posted with iBlogger from my iPhone]

Even You Wouldn't Believe It.

Tonight, I realized the need to be independent.

Sprained my ankle badly during training. Drove home in pain only to coincidentally find out that the jack for my car charger fell apart. Reached home, couldn't find a parking in front of my house (which is rare) and had to park in front of the neighbor's place which means I have to wake up at 6am tmr to re-park the car. Noticed a small space which might be able to fit my car, but remembered that reverse sensor is not working after car went for redressing. Took 15 minutes just to pack my bags and limp to the gate only to have my 2 dogs pounce at me, running frantically out to pee; which in the process, one jumped so high she scratched my thighs till it bled and the other kicked my sprained ankle. Dropped all my bags and spent another 5 minutes just retrieving my stuff which scattered on the porch floor. Entered house only to find dad talking about how the reverse sensor in my car cannot be fixed anymore because the guy who resprayed it cut the wires off after deciding it was the easiest way to detach it.

That's my day.

In realization, that this is a need to be independent - when no one is around to help you up and you keep falling, you pull yourself up. Even if it hurts so badly, you gotta just get up and keep on going.

xoxo.

Move Forward Or Give Up.

and it was heard..

There comes a time when every life goes off course. In this desperate moment you must choose your direction. Will you fight to stay on the path while others tell you who you are? Or will you label yourself? Will you be honored by your choice? Or will you embrace your new path? Each morning you choose to move forward or to simply give up.

***

Irony - Sleep was painful and tiring the past 2 nights with intervals of sudden awakenings followed by a series of massive headaches. Trust me when I say, not a good idea to sleep with your handphone strapped so tightly around your chest. Foolish of me to think that the beeps will come in, when of course, it didn't.

Feels good to give yourself a hard Slap once in awhile, to realize that you're not dead and that the world/people don't evolve around you. You, in fact, are expected to evolve around them. Like a green slimy creature who becomes its environment, slowly losing its self identity and purpose of being.

My serene run yesterday evening did however do some good, brought me back to how solace felt like and gave the mind a moment of rest, minus the after run burning knee joint aches of course.

I've been running a lot lately, and often not knowing my destination. It is the denial that as long as you continue running, you seem like you're moving forward but in actual fact, you may be going in the exact opposite direction. Not only do I need a moment of pause, I need a guide. Is that how it is with many out there or am I a special case of Benjamin Button?

Remedy of the tired mind: Needs a bowl of cold Caesar salad and a good company.

:(

Silver Lining.

Hi you,

I know you don't read my blog. But the little gesture of remembering my favorite chocolate and bringing it to me today knowing I was down...was really, really sweet.

Such little things, go such a long way. Without even knowing it.

Thank you.

:)

Still Here, But Already Gone.

Artist: Lucie Silvas
Title: Already Gone

I can't stop the moon from rising
And the sun will set exactly where it should
I can't stop the rivers from running
God only knows I'd stop you if I could

From not seeing me how you used to
From walking out the door
I can't stop you from not loving me anymore

I can do nothing if your mind's made up
No matter how I feel it's not enough for the both of us
So don't lie to me cause there's no need
I have fooled myself for too long
Cause you're still here but you're already gone

Spring time will come after winter
But the winter seems to last the whole year long
And I know, I know you're just trying to make it easier
While I'm sitting here trying to be strong

You can say you love me
It won't sound right anymore
Cause it's written on your face
So what are you waiting for?

I can do nothing if your mind's made up
No matter how I feel it's not enough for the both of us
So don't lie to me cause there's no need
I have fooled myself for too long
Cause you're still here but you're already gone

Your coat's still in the hallway
My heart's still in your hands
I don't want to face the truth right now
But that's not who I am

No that's not who I am

I can do nothing if your mind's made up
No matter how I feel it's not enough for the both of us
So don't lie to me cause there's no need
I have fooled myself for too long
Cause you're still here but you're already gone

Spur moment of Life in a song.

There's a line.

off to wherever solace may be. Not of a return to the expected.

True Love, by His Standards.

and she said..

Real love warrants some form of investment on your part. You clock in time, put in effort and you invest in the person you love over and over again – without end. And if you run dry from giving, and find that you've given until there's nothing more to give, you go back to God, recharge and then you invest all over again.

"I love you." You can't just say the words and assume that it means something. People say that all the time. Even when they don't mean it. But real, honest-to-God love finds its substance in conduct. If you love, you've got to act on it. Stand up for it. Fight for it.

''If you love, you've got to act on it. Stand up for it. Fight for it.''

And most difficult of all, you've got to be willing to make sacrifices for it. Even it means giving up some of the things that are precious to you. Take tangibles, for example – like money, possessions or a better job some place else. Or even the touchy intangibles we so rarely talk about and carefully skirt around when we have to – like pride, or face, or ego.


The root word 'Forgive' is only mentioned 53 times in the New King James Version while the word 'Love' is mentioned a staggering 362 times – seven times more! So, if we are told to forgive a brother who sins not seven times, but seventy-seven times (Matthew 18:21-22), how much more are we called to love?

But you can't call it love
if you don't do anything
to act on how you feel.

In its most ideal form, Love is not Love until it is selfless and sacrificial. In all things, it is gentle, compassionate, tender and kind. But it also fiercely protects its own. And even as it offers security, it doesn't ever seek to possess. It isn't bridled by pride and jealousy. Neither is it uncaring or aloof. Instead, it stands in perfect balance amidst the chaos of this world. It dotes but never spoils. It corrects but remembers no wrongs. It accepts all, forgives all and harbours nothing of ill intent. That, is true love by His standards.

Even if it means giving up, something that is precious to you.